i don't know what to write, i've sat here for the past 15 minutes trying to write something deep and worth reading/writing. there isn't much to update except that i'm generally having a pretty good time living life. yeah... it's not all rainbows and cute puppies... but i can't complain. i have a family that (despite being crazy and so good at driving me up the wall) loves me, friends that love me, a job that puts money in my bank account, good health etc... and all that good stuff.
OK what's really on my mind... the xmas holidays always seem to evoke a melancholic feeling in me. but this year it was different. xmas came and went with out too much of a thought. no tree this year, not even our ficus was decorated. no lights or decorations on the house. just the mindless routine of going to some family member's house, eating way too much food, shooting the shit with uncles i haven't seen since last xmas, and explaining over and over again where bishop is to someone who barely knows where yosemite is. it was slightly disconcerting that this season wasn't even melancholic... it was just another day. which i guess is true. well, happy new year folks. it's going to be 2009 and we're all going to look the same come january 1st.
btw... the fiddle is beautiful!
December 29, 2008
December 5, 2008
highlights of the late
bishop--> bay area--> san diego--> bishop
driving through the mojave with "i wanna dance with somebody" by whitney houston BLASTING and singing at the top of my lungs. oh my gosh that was so much fun :)
swimming in the ocean and getting slammed by the waves. trying to body surf. getting high off life watching the sun set over the pacific.
heart to heart with the brother. sitting on the carpet and talking.
spending an evening catching up with old friends and old flames.
brain exploding with information about fire. unlimited coffee and breath mints.
wandering the streets of san diego, people watching, exploring the night life, poking fun at aweful cover bands.
listening to hip hop really loud so that i can stay awake in the car.
getting attacked with love by PooDookie and spooning after. waking up with a paw in my face and by best friend beside me :)
driving through the mojave with "i wanna dance with somebody" by whitney houston BLASTING and singing at the top of my lungs. oh my gosh that was so much fun :)
swimming in the ocean and getting slammed by the waves. trying to body surf. getting high off life watching the sun set over the pacific.
heart to heart with the brother. sitting on the carpet and talking.
spending an evening catching up with old friends and old flames.
brain exploding with information about fire. unlimited coffee and breath mints.
wandering the streets of san diego, people watching, exploring the night life, poking fun at aweful cover bands.
listening to hip hop really loud so that i can stay awake in the car.
getting attacked with love by PooDookie and spooning after. waking up with a paw in my face and by best friend beside me :)
November 22, 2008
on the porch again...
sitting on the porch with fresh air in my lungs, music in my ears, and hot tea in my lap is one of my favorite things to do. it is time for me... time to talk to good people and time to think to myself. i get to reminisce about the past and dream about the future, whether it is just tomorrow, 3 weeks or 3 years from now.
well, where will i be in 1 year? it will be fun to go back and read what i write now 1 year from now. i can say as much as: i'll probably be out of bishop, going on to my next adventure. learning more and experiencing more. india? nepal? oregon?... another small town in california? who knows...
i have had a lot of time to think these past few days. spending hours on end in a trailer in the middle of the desert by yourself will do that to ya... i miss my friends and family. i miss spending time with people who are familiar. i miss that warm feeling of vegging out on a couch crocheting and watching happy movies... sipping hot chocolate and munching on some fresh baked goods. i miss walking at night crunching through the frosty leaves and talking about... stuff, anything really. i miss cooking huge meals and singing to bad music at the top of my lungs. i miss cuddling up with pooka. i miss climbing with my old buddies. the list goes on.
... but along with everything that i miss i realize that all of that isn't really gone. i still have all of that. i still have those opportunities and the memories are still alive. it's hard to not focus on the past because it's always the good times that stick out... but when you really think about it there have been some pretty shitty times too. and to be able to look back and see that you've survived it all is quite hopeful. like i've said time and time before: people have come and gone in my life, hearts have been hurt, doubts have taken over, and everything in between... but life goes on regardless and things turn out okay in the end. knowing that is quite comforting, actually.
i have no idea where this rant came from. i guess sitting out on the porch does that to you...
the smells in bishop are now familiar.
well, where will i be in 1 year? it will be fun to go back and read what i write now 1 year from now. i can say as much as: i'll probably be out of bishop, going on to my next adventure. learning more and experiencing more. india? nepal? oregon?... another small town in california? who knows...
i have had a lot of time to think these past few days. spending hours on end in a trailer in the middle of the desert by yourself will do that to ya... i miss my friends and family. i miss spending time with people who are familiar. i miss that warm feeling of vegging out on a couch crocheting and watching happy movies... sipping hot chocolate and munching on some fresh baked goods. i miss walking at night crunching through the frosty leaves and talking about... stuff, anything really. i miss cooking huge meals and singing to bad music at the top of my lungs. i miss cuddling up with pooka. i miss climbing with my old buddies. the list goes on.
... but along with everything that i miss i realize that all of that isn't really gone. i still have all of that. i still have those opportunities and the memories are still alive. it's hard to not focus on the past because it's always the good times that stick out... but when you really think about it there have been some pretty shitty times too. and to be able to look back and see that you've survived it all is quite hopeful. like i've said time and time before: people have come and gone in my life, hearts have been hurt, doubts have taken over, and everything in between... but life goes on regardless and things turn out okay in the end. knowing that is quite comforting, actually.
i have no idea where this rant came from. i guess sitting out on the porch does that to you...
the smells in bishop are now familiar.
November 4, 2008
my legs hurt from dancing
las tortugas dance of the dead
holy shit... 4 days of music, fun, drugs, sex, and rock 'n roll... minus the drugs and sex. haha.
jam bands, bluegrass, country, blues, rock and roll, funk, jazz, reggae... you name it, they got it.
crazy costumes, rainy and wet, beautiful forest, music 'tll 4am, pot, fire, yum.
c'mon it was a damn hippie fest for goodness sake! what do you expect...
i've decided that dancing to funky jazz is my favorite type of dancing. and that dancing is great exercise, and that moving with the beat of music is good for the soul :)
'till next year turtles... 'till next year.
holy shit... 4 days of music, fun, drugs, sex, and rock 'n roll... minus the drugs and sex. haha.
jam bands, bluegrass, country, blues, rock and roll, funk, jazz, reggae... you name it, they got it.
crazy costumes, rainy and wet, beautiful forest, music 'tll 4am, pot, fire, yum.
c'mon it was a damn hippie fest for goodness sake! what do you expect...
i've decided that dancing to funky jazz is my favorite type of dancing. and that dancing is great exercise, and that moving with the beat of music is good for the soul :)
'till next year turtles... 'till next year.
October 12, 2008
hot cocoa and a fire
It seems like just a few weeks ago it was blazing hot in the afternoon sun… wait, it really was. And it seems like just last week the aspens were turning and fall was on its way… yep that happened too. And yet last night it was 29 degrees outside. That week of autumn was great… Winter has barged right in, hit me in my numb face and froze my feet off. The mountains are snow capped, the boulders are like big blocks of ice and the crisp cold air is filled with burning fireplaces. I can see my breath in my room but out here in the…uh… foyer (no longer can I bask in the warmth of the summer porch) the cold is cut by the warm fire our little fern made for us. It’s crackling, hissing and glowing… and feels so so good. But I’m still in my down jacket, long johns and wool socks.
Heh! Wasn’t it just a few days ago we were waiting for the “perfect conditions” to go climbing? It was too hot… boo hoo. Well, let me tell you… the weather is freaking cold now! Who the hell climbs when they can’t even feel their fingers? What kind of crazy mongrels would put their digits through such pain and agony? Besides yours truly, it seems as though everyone and their mothers come to the east side. My days of running from the sun, seeking the shaded routes and being the only one at the buttermilks are gone... For now. They will leave, we’ll get our rocks back… and pick up their cigarette butts, beer cans and dog shit, and wipe off their god damn tick marks! Okay… I’m done with being a snob.
It’s official. Bishop will be my home for another year. It’s comforting yet still very scary to wrap my mind around the concept of actually living here. I’ve become accustomed to considering this job and this lifestyle as a type of extended summer vacation. Not quite reality or a real life, really. It’s just been a whirlwind of happenings that I was able to get lost in. I’m not referring to “lost” as in no direction, but “lost” as in bouncing around with not much of a worry. Pretty soon I’ll have to consider this experience as a real job, get my shit together and focus… because I’ll need to so that I can stay in tip top toxicology shape! That is the price I have to pay so I can say NO to 9 to 5, 5 days a week in a lab dousing little brine shrimp with polluted affluent water. I delved deep and thought hard… I came to the conclusion that I still need to fuck up a few more times and make some more mistakes. I need to explore my options because right now is the time to be wrong and know it’s okay. Right now is prime learning time. And what better way to pursue that than to work with lovely people, an open and willing office, knowledgeable bosses/coworkers who offer a vast range of opportunity, and endless rocks just outside the door?
I was told that whatever decision I make: stay in bishop, move on etc… will be a good one. There is really no bad options… they are just vastly different. And that is so true. What is one year?... that’s no time at all. That is just a quarter of what college was. And how fast did college fly by? Damn fast. Heck… 6 months since I took this job and moved out here has almost passed. One year is one year… I can’t spend too much energy focusing on that far into the future. What’s important is now because right now is happening.
Heh! Wasn’t it just a few days ago we were waiting for the “perfect conditions” to go climbing? It was too hot… boo hoo. Well, let me tell you… the weather is freaking cold now! Who the hell climbs when they can’t even feel their fingers? What kind of crazy mongrels would put their digits through such pain and agony? Besides yours truly, it seems as though everyone and their mothers come to the east side. My days of running from the sun, seeking the shaded routes and being the only one at the buttermilks are gone... For now. They will leave, we’ll get our rocks back… and pick up their cigarette butts, beer cans and dog shit, and wipe off their god damn tick marks! Okay… I’m done with being a snob.
It’s official. Bishop will be my home for another year. It’s comforting yet still very scary to wrap my mind around the concept of actually living here. I’ve become accustomed to considering this job and this lifestyle as a type of extended summer vacation. Not quite reality or a real life, really. It’s just been a whirlwind of happenings that I was able to get lost in. I’m not referring to “lost” as in no direction, but “lost” as in bouncing around with not much of a worry. Pretty soon I’ll have to consider this experience as a real job, get my shit together and focus… because I’ll need to so that I can stay in tip top toxicology shape! That is the price I have to pay so I can say NO to 9 to 5, 5 days a week in a lab dousing little brine shrimp with polluted affluent water. I delved deep and thought hard… I came to the conclusion that I still need to fuck up a few more times and make some more mistakes. I need to explore my options because right now is the time to be wrong and know it’s okay. Right now is prime learning time. And what better way to pursue that than to work with lovely people, an open and willing office, knowledgeable bosses/coworkers who offer a vast range of opportunity, and endless rocks just outside the door?
I was told that whatever decision I make: stay in bishop, move on etc… will be a good one. There is really no bad options… they are just vastly different. And that is so true. What is one year?... that’s no time at all. That is just a quarter of what college was. And how fast did college fly by? Damn fast. Heck… 6 months since I took this job and moved out here has almost passed. One year is one year… I can’t spend too much energy focusing on that far into the future. What’s important is now because right now is happening.
October 2, 2008
my 2 cents...
one of my biggest fears is settling into something, then getting bored and wanting more. having stability yet still being stimulated is difficult to maintain and being satisfied versus wanting more is a delicate balance that is hard to achieve. i think that it is good to want nothing and to be happy with what one already has. however, wanting more is a key feeling that propels action... action to make things happen. wanting is the cause of change and change is often an aspect of life that one learns the most from.
one philosophy that i have yet to master or even really put into practice, but truly believe in, is to live for today and live it full.
one philosophy that i have yet to master or even really put into practice, but truly believe in, is to live for today and live it full.
September 10, 2008
it smells like rain
it seems as though i have a theme of scent going along with this blog type thing. i can't help it... smells are so key in triggering my memories, feelings and ideas. i was washing the dishes today and reminiscing about the past few days. it started to rain and get windy... rain in bishop? weird. the wet air reminded me of how quickly the autumn is coming and quickly the summer is leaving. the first smell of rain reminds me of halloween, starting school again, breaking out the winter wear and putting away the shorts and tank tops. it reminded me of drinking hot chocolate and wearing my galoshes. i miss those memories, for sure, but the prospect of making new and extremely different ones is exciting.
aside from the scent theme of this blog, it seems as though the theme of life here in bishop so far has been something like: "goddamn how did i get to be so lucky? and why is my life so good?"
not bad huh?
aside from the normal and inevitable twists and turns of life, the comings and goings of loved ones, and the desire for what is comfortable i'd have to say that life has been pretty god damn good. a few nights ago i came back from a little evening bouldering to a huge home cooked meal consisting of a delicious steak, mashed potatoes, corn salad etc... all prepared by the boys of the house. we sat around a home baked pie and went on for hours about how good life was. how dare the usgs force us out into the mountains to go backpacking and get paid! how dare my boss make us take a mandatory day off to go climbing. how dare they supply us with a sweet house?! it is preposterous! the NERVE!
honestly, how did i get so lucky as to find such a great job with such great people? this past weekend is a testament to how awesome everything comes together. a short day of work led to a late afternoon rope swing/swimming hole session followed by evening bouldering and then delicious food and great company (indluding our hilarious land lord). then the weekend began with a trip out to the mountains for a full day of climbing and an evening in lee vining for hours of crazy dancing, delicious food, amazing music, and a night adventure to remember... which included driving around the desrt looking for hot springs, almost running out of gas and laying out in the freezing cold at 2am huddled together staring at the crystal clear starry sky. a miserable scrunched up session of 4 people pretending to sleep in one car ended day one. then up bright and early the next day to finally find the hot springs, eat a massive breakfast and go climbing alllllll freaking day again.
and monday begins... with a trio backpacking trip from devils postpile to tuolome meadows. done in less than two days. damn... it has been good. time for rest and relaxation, then off to vegas for soil sampling during the day and climbing in the evening... of course. red rocks here i come!
it gets better.... ;)
aside from the scent theme of this blog, it seems as though the theme of life here in bishop so far has been something like: "goddamn how did i get to be so lucky? and why is my life so good?"
not bad huh?
aside from the normal and inevitable twists and turns of life, the comings and goings of loved ones, and the desire for what is comfortable i'd have to say that life has been pretty god damn good. a few nights ago i came back from a little evening bouldering to a huge home cooked meal consisting of a delicious steak, mashed potatoes, corn salad etc... all prepared by the boys of the house. we sat around a home baked pie and went on for hours about how good life was. how dare the usgs force us out into the mountains to go backpacking and get paid! how dare my boss make us take a mandatory day off to go climbing. how dare they supply us with a sweet house?! it is preposterous! the NERVE!
honestly, how did i get so lucky as to find such a great job with such great people? this past weekend is a testament to how awesome everything comes together. a short day of work led to a late afternoon rope swing/swimming hole session followed by evening bouldering and then delicious food and great company (indluding our hilarious land lord). then the weekend began with a trip out to the mountains for a full day of climbing and an evening in lee vining for hours of crazy dancing, delicious food, amazing music, and a night adventure to remember... which included driving around the desrt looking for hot springs, almost running out of gas and laying out in the freezing cold at 2am huddled together staring at the crystal clear starry sky. a miserable scrunched up session of 4 people pretending to sleep in one car ended day one. then up bright and early the next day to finally find the hot springs, eat a massive breakfast and go climbing alllllll freaking day again.
and monday begins... with a trio backpacking trip from devils postpile to tuolome meadows. done in less than two days. damn... it has been good. time for rest and relaxation, then off to vegas for soil sampling during the day and climbing in the evening... of course. red rocks here i come!
it gets better.... ;)
July 16, 2008
new smells
the new smells of bishop confuse me. they are just that, new. they don't have an association with thoughts, memories or anything personal at all. the smells are musty and hot, like davis. but at the same time not at all like davis. i was biking along the outskirts of town today and i got a whiff... it hit me, just then. the scent of dried grass and the hot dirt road filled my nose and i had nothing, no emotion associated with it. maybe a little curiosity. most peculiarly, the smell was no different than any other dried grassy field. you know that smell. in davis it always smelled good. in the berkeley hills it always smelled good too. i would get ready for what was about to happen when that smell came by me. take a deep breath, inhale with all your/my might, smile, hold it in a little bit and finally exhale with true and intangible satisfaction. so simple and yet so beautiful. it smelled warm and it smelled familiar. it smelled of hay, stale water, happiness and sunny afternoons.
smells mysteriously do that to you. one whiff and you're transported to another time. a memory perhaps. a nap on the quad or in the arboretum during the lazy spring quarter. good times had with friends, or a brisk shuffle to class in the davis winter, or a few hours spent warm at cafe roma (when it was still there).
i absolutely love how smells carry that much power. for now the smells here in bishop are empty. over time, maybe, they will build and grow into something familiar. i wonder how long it might take and when i will realize it.
smells mysteriously do that to you. one whiff and you're transported to another time. a memory perhaps. a nap on the quad or in the arboretum during the lazy spring quarter. good times had with friends, or a brisk shuffle to class in the davis winter, or a few hours spent warm at cafe roma (when it was still there).
i absolutely love how smells carry that much power. for now the smells here in bishop are empty. over time, maybe, they will build and grow into something familiar. i wonder how long it might take and when i will realize it.
July 11, 2008
mono update
out in mono county. don't have too much time to write. very very dirty. no river or lake to bathe in today.
lots of field work in the bodie hills. learning about plants. head explode. having fun. good company. hot. sweaty. many biting insects. itchy ITCHY!!!
last night we went into town and to the local mobile mart where this really cool band, the trespassers, were jamming out. cool bluegrass country dance type stuff. yay! got to dance! haha.
live band + happy people + crazy dancing + beer i enjoy=awesome night.
been here since monday, staying till next thursday.
on a more depressing note (more like the real world unfortunately) bad news from home. going back when field work is done. or sooner. ahh.
lots of field work in the bodie hills. learning about plants. head explode. having fun. good company. hot. sweaty. many biting insects. itchy ITCHY!!!
last night we went into town and to the local mobile mart where this really cool band, the trespassers, were jamming out. cool bluegrass country dance type stuff. yay! got to dance! haha.
live band + happy people + crazy dancing + beer i enjoy=awesome night.
been here since monday, staying till next thursday.
on a more depressing note (more like the real world unfortunately) bad news from home. going back when field work is done. or sooner. ahh.
July 3, 2008
a week of "firsts"
first trip out to the fields.
first time climbing locally.
first taste of few worries.
first week in bishop.
i'm sitting here on the front porch at the house in bishop. it's a warm evening, there is a nice breeze and i'm listening to music REALLY loud... couldn't ask for a better set up.
i just spent the day climbing and exploring the mountains, then i biked over to the local grocery store for some shoppin, gorged on good food, and chatted with good people . now i'm basking in my stink and winding down the day with a little bit of relaxation. i guess i'll just start off with describing the past few days. i spent some time by whitney portal and did field work with the research teams. essentially my first "field trip." only a few words are needed to describe what it was like: camping, beer, fire, hiking, fishing and plants. it's hard to believe i'm getting paid for this. i've been so spoiled with my jobs... then: getting paid to climb and to teach people to climb; and now: getting paid to hike, camp and count/sample plants. this is the life :)
other than work things this new town are definitely looking up. looking up both figuratively and literally... into the mountains. it's a bit smoky right now but going up to the higher elevations is... um... freakin awesome. i explored the rock creek area today. it had been a while since i've climbed so it was really nice to get out there. i definitely got my ass kicked and my mental state calibrated for climbing. good shit. also, met some cool people... i must say, climbers are such nice people. i love it. aside from the trip into the cooler and higher elevation areas it was really nice to be able to just live. this is where the "first taste of few worries" comes from. for once i can spend a break or a weekend not worrying about exams or work that needs to be done, or about finding a job and what i am going to do for the rest of my life. yes, i do still need to keep the long term future in the back of my mind... but for now things are fine, steady and happy.
all in all, i like it here in bishop. i can sit in a coffee shop and just hang out, just like what i'm used to in davis. i can go climbing within a 10 minute drive or be in the mountains, which is new and definitely not like davis... but i can definitely embrace this change. i can even walk around town and recognize people already! however, i can not go grocery shopping or do anything down town past 9pm- but i guess i can handle that ;)
What does tomorrow bring? probably going on a hike or exploring some new climbing areas. then, a nice little july 4th BBQ at the house with all the bossmen/coworkers and their significant others. like i said, this is the life.
first time climbing locally.
first taste of few worries.
first week in bishop.
i'm sitting here on the front porch at the house in bishop. it's a warm evening, there is a nice breeze and i'm listening to music REALLY loud... couldn't ask for a better set up.
i just spent the day climbing and exploring the mountains, then i biked over to the local grocery store for some shoppin, gorged on good food, and chatted with good people . now i'm basking in my stink and winding down the day with a little bit of relaxation. i guess i'll just start off with describing the past few days. i spent some time by whitney portal and did field work with the research teams. essentially my first "field trip." only a few words are needed to describe what it was like: camping, beer, fire, hiking, fishing and plants. it's hard to believe i'm getting paid for this. i've been so spoiled with my jobs... then: getting paid to climb and to teach people to climb; and now: getting paid to hike, camp and count/sample plants. this is the life :)
other than work things this new town are definitely looking up. looking up both figuratively and literally... into the mountains. it's a bit smoky right now but going up to the higher elevations is... um... freakin awesome. i explored the rock creek area today. it had been a while since i've climbed so it was really nice to get out there. i definitely got my ass kicked and my mental state calibrated for climbing. good shit. also, met some cool people... i must say, climbers are such nice people. i love it. aside from the trip into the cooler and higher elevation areas it was really nice to be able to just live. this is where the "first taste of few worries" comes from. for once i can spend a break or a weekend not worrying about exams or work that needs to be done, or about finding a job and what i am going to do for the rest of my life. yes, i do still need to keep the long term future in the back of my mind... but for now things are fine, steady and happy.
all in all, i like it here in bishop. i can sit in a coffee shop and just hang out, just like what i'm used to in davis. i can go climbing within a 10 minute drive or be in the mountains, which is new and definitely not like davis... but i can definitely embrace this change. i can even walk around town and recognize people already! however, i can not go grocery shopping or do anything down town past 9pm- but i guess i can handle that ;)
What does tomorrow bring? probably going on a hike or exploring some new climbing areas. then, a nice little july 4th BBQ at the house with all the bossmen/coworkers and their significant others. like i said, this is the life.
June 26, 2008
my new home.
i figure that since i like writing and since i like people i'll start a blog to keep me connected. connected with both myself and those who care enough to read... i'll use this blog to document new adventures. life here in bishop. life on the east side. life in the real world? no, this can't be it.
well, first full day here and what have i accomplished? i managed to meet some climbers, exchange contact info and hopefully get some partners in the process. i've also managed to wander the town, do some yoga, sit in a coffee shop... i can't complain really.
i'll have more interesting stories (hopefully) as the weeks and months progress-i just wanted to kick this off nicely. off to bed, first day in the field tomorrow :)
well, first full day here and what have i accomplished? i managed to meet some climbers, exchange contact info and hopefully get some partners in the process. i've also managed to wander the town, do some yoga, sit in a coffee shop... i can't complain really.
i'll have more interesting stories (hopefully) as the weeks and months progress-i just wanted to kick this off nicely. off to bed, first day in the field tomorrow :)
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